Saturday 19 March 2011

Hottie and the Nottie stories




They call it the “bargain bin,” the big basket of discount DVDs of questionable quality. We assume that the paltry $5 price tag still gives these films too much credit. Is there anything of use in these wire crates worth the implied value in the word “bargain”? One man braves the bin to find out.
Good Christ almighty, what have I stumbled upon? How could I have known–truly known--that the hour and a half of so-called “content” on this DVD was a vile, wretched monster born of my worst nightmares? I suppose I could have looked it up on IMDB, but that’s cheating. When I snagged this from a Walgreen’s bargain bin at three in the morning, I knew (as any rational person might) that this would be awful. Little did I know that I was paying $3.99 plus tax for the single most offensive, unfunny, lazy piece of trash ever put to plastic. I am not sure the English language has the capacity to encapsulate the vitriol and hatred I have for The Hottie & the Nottie, but by gum, let’s give it a shot

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