Acting is an absolute moneymaking career but additionally among the most demanding. Prior to you avail yourself for the auditions; here are some of the things you should anticipate:
1. Study the whole script and make certain that you simply realize it. You'll be requisite to grasp the character you would be representing; and how he/she relates with other characters within the film. It really is expected of you to show the various attitudes your role has in the direction of other characters that relate with him/her in the act. Also, understanding your character's function could be essential and do not be afraid to read from the script in the event you skip out on a couple of phrases; but don't overdo it.
2. Mind your behavior. Most of us have certain mannerisms which may possibly not be appropriate at the auditioning room. A few of them are chewing gum, talking too much and forgetting your instructions, touching the director or any of his/her possessions, smoking etc. You might be used to them; but it's recommended to shun these behaviors or else you may piss off the casting director and consequently not stand a opportunity.
3. Show respect to everyone within the area for auditions for actors. When you enter the audition centre, there could be one or two people who you could simply recognize, but additionally complete strangers can be present. These people might be the stylist, digital camera man and might be a representative from a certain acting business. To test you, the representative may possibly wear shabby clothes these that you may be tempted to assume the person's of no good. Then he might wait until all the others have asked you their inquiries and then request you a extremely straightforward query. If you reply rudely or mockingly, most probably you'll be proven the door.
4. Be short and do what's anticipated of you. Through the time it is your turn to be auditioned, the panel would currently be fatigued because other folks had already handed through them. Make their job straightforward by offering a really short introduction of yourself and offer your greatest overall performance at the shortest time possible. Prevent repeating words or saying things that do not make feeling as this might be an indication of nervousness.
5. Often be ready for acting auditions. The panel may direct you to complete something which you didn't feel of; for example, they may want you to operate around the podium inside a particular way or chuckle inside a certain type. Always be ready for the sudden as they may possibly wish to test whether you may be creative sufficient to fill some blank spaces around the character they have chosen for you.
6. Stage presence. Make an effort to be part and parcel of these you are operating with. Bear in mind the panel has taken its time for you to assess you and they need to be handled deservingly. Reply the inquiries they ask you and laugh with them once they crack joke, but additionally be conscious as they may be testing you. Just do anything to show them that you simply are there with them instead of day dreaming.
Finally, when signing out from the audition centre do not forget to thank the folks who assisted you. These are the people you talked to from the time you arrived to when you depart the premise. Also, ensure you sign out your name as this may be used to verify the quantity of time you spent at the auditions.
Entertainment is an action, event or activity that aims to entertain, amuse and interest an audience of one or more people. The audience may have a passive role, as in the case of persons watching a play, opera, television show or movie, or the audience role may be active, as in the case of games. Entertainment can be public or private, involving formal, scripted performance, as in the case of theater or concerts; or unscripted and spontaneous.
Monday, 18 July 2011
Overview of Rihanna Musical Career
Born in Barbados, Rihanna is a recording artist whose genre of focus is R&B. Her full name is Robyn Rihanna Fenty but is better known with her stage name, Rihanna. She moved to States at the age of 16, had an addition with the world renowned Jay-Z and subsequently got signed up with the label, Def Jam Recordings. Since then, there was no looking back and the singer embarked on an endlessly successful musical career. Rihanna released her first musical album in 2005 which reached amongst Top 10 in the Billboard 200 chart and spawned a single, Pon de Replay which entered the Billboard Hot 100 chart.
It has since been a trend for Rihanna tickets to get sold out within no time and for her concerts to be immensely successful and fully crowded. In addition to having extra ordinary musical talents, the young singer well knows how to wow her audiences by keeping her stage performances lively and interesting keeping her dressing attractively fashionable. Rihanna has also remained popular in terms for her fashions that she has been presenting in various appearances and on the red carpets. In 2006, she came out with her second album, A Girl Like Me which reached amongst Top 5 albums and contained a super hit single, SOS. The 2007 album, Good Girl Gone Bad remained the best of all which got nominated in categories for Grammys and spawned four singles that charted. These were; Don't Stop the Music, Take a Bow, Umbrella and Disturbia. In 2009 and 2010, Rihanna released the albums; Rated R and Loud respectively both of which spawned three hit singles each with those from the fifth album, Loud remaining Number 1 hits.
Owing to the large popularity of Rihanna's music, the singer attracts huge crowds of people in her concerts that are further aided by her tactics of handling them with impressive performing styles. No wonder Rihanna tickets remain highly demanded and quickly sold. The singer numerous accolades to her record which include four American Music Awards, one BRIT Award, one World Music Award, four Grammy Awards and eighteen Billboard Music Awards. She has also been ranked at Number 17 amongst the Artists of the 2000s and has been rated as Digital Songs Artist for 2000s. Rihanna has sold more than 60 million singles and over 20 million albums and became one of the best selling artists of all time.
It has since been a trend for Rihanna tickets to get sold out within no time and for her concerts to be immensely successful and fully crowded. In addition to having extra ordinary musical talents, the young singer well knows how to wow her audiences by keeping her stage performances lively and interesting keeping her dressing attractively fashionable. Rihanna has also remained popular in terms for her fashions that she has been presenting in various appearances and on the red carpets. In 2006, she came out with her second album, A Girl Like Me which reached amongst Top 5 albums and contained a super hit single, SOS. The 2007 album, Good Girl Gone Bad remained the best of all which got nominated in categories for Grammys and spawned four singles that charted. These were; Don't Stop the Music, Take a Bow, Umbrella and Disturbia. In 2009 and 2010, Rihanna released the albums; Rated R and Loud respectively both of which spawned three hit singles each with those from the fifth album, Loud remaining Number 1 hits.
Owing to the large popularity of Rihanna's music, the singer attracts huge crowds of people in her concerts that are further aided by her tactics of handling them with impressive performing styles. No wonder Rihanna tickets remain highly demanded and quickly sold. The singer numerous accolades to her record which include four American Music Awards, one BRIT Award, one World Music Award, four Grammy Awards and eighteen Billboard Music Awards. She has also been ranked at Number 17 amongst the Artists of the 2000s and has been rated as Digital Songs Artist for 2000s. Rihanna has sold more than 60 million singles and over 20 million albums and became one of the best selling artists of all time.
An Easy Way to Watch English Movies
Thanks to the internet, many movie lovers can have quick and easy access to their favorite flicks from many websites that offer such services. There is such a wide variety of English movies to choose from in different genres like action, comedy, drama, horror, romance and animation. By making use of these websites, one no longer needs to go through 2 hours of movie-watching only to realize what a bad choice they made. Here, there are movie trailers available which one can quickly check out to help them make a good pick. There are also movie ratings and expert reviews on all English movies available on these sites.
These websites have an easy-to-use interface and are easy to navigate. The movies have been put into several categories to make them easy to find. These categories can be according to genre, year of release, main actor and alphabetical order. So if there is a particular actor or actress who happens to be a favorite, it is easy to find their movies. One can also find the latest movies by looking under the year we are in at present. These websites also rank movies according to box-office earnings or rave reviews, and these can also help one choose the best English movies to watch.
The more popular websites dealing with English movies usually have high profile critics who give written reviews on all the movies available. These are experts who have played a part in movie making at some point in their career, and therefore know a thing or two about movies. There are also forums where fans who have watched the same movies give their take. They also get to reply to the critics whether they agree with them or not. The whole set up provides a good wholesome discussion on the movie that will help one who is yet to watch it.
The websites dealing with English movies are designed to allow one to watch a movie instantly online without bothering to download it. With a user-friendly interface and the latest high-tech movie-watching graphics, one is guaranteed top-quality entertainment as long as they have a good internet connection. The home page usually has a search bar that one can use to quickly find the English movie they want and proceed to play it. The movies are available in the latest formats, including HD and 3D-movies.
Those who don't want to watch their favorite English movies online can easily download them in the format of their choice for later viewing. There are many websites that provide free English movies downloads, so finding movies should not be a problem. One can register with these websites so that they can even get notifications through email whenever a new movie is uploaded. These websites get updated regularly, so those who visit frequently stand a good chance of being amongst the first people to watch a movie when it is availed. These websites have made it easier for the many fans of English movies to get easy access to the material.
These websites have an easy-to-use interface and are easy to navigate. The movies have been put into several categories to make them easy to find. These categories can be according to genre, year of release, main actor and alphabetical order. So if there is a particular actor or actress who happens to be a favorite, it is easy to find their movies. One can also find the latest movies by looking under the year we are in at present. These websites also rank movies according to box-office earnings or rave reviews, and these can also help one choose the best English movies to watch.
The more popular websites dealing with English movies usually have high profile critics who give written reviews on all the movies available. These are experts who have played a part in movie making at some point in their career, and therefore know a thing or two about movies. There are also forums where fans who have watched the same movies give their take. They also get to reply to the critics whether they agree with them or not. The whole set up provides a good wholesome discussion on the movie that will help one who is yet to watch it.
The websites dealing with English movies are designed to allow one to watch a movie instantly online without bothering to download it. With a user-friendly interface and the latest high-tech movie-watching graphics, one is guaranteed top-quality entertainment as long as they have a good internet connection. The home page usually has a search bar that one can use to quickly find the English movie they want and proceed to play it. The movies are available in the latest formats, including HD and 3D-movies.
Those who don't want to watch their favorite English movies online can easily download them in the format of their choice for later viewing. There are many websites that provide free English movies downloads, so finding movies should not be a problem. One can register with these websites so that they can even get notifications through email whenever a new movie is uploaded. These websites get updated regularly, so those who visit frequently stand a good chance of being amongst the first people to watch a movie when it is availed. These websites have made it easier for the many fans of English movies to get easy access to the material.
Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows Part 2 review
Hogwarts is calling again this weekend and the fans are going to have lot of fun with this movie, which is a visual treat. David Yates didn't restrain himself as he has tried every trick in the book to make this movie memorable for the audience.
THE POTTER mania is back again, what with David Yates and JK Rowling having to offer the last movie of the Potter series. The review of the movie is great, as per critics, as the cinematography is perfectly in place with the latest technology in Hollywood. If not a Potter fan, a person who loves watching real magic created in front of the camera should definitely watch this weekend's most awaited film 'Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2'.
The darkest part of the Potter series is also the shortest part. It finishes in 2 hours and 10 minutes but the tone of the film is just right. The last part ending at the death of Dobby (the house Elf) this part takes off from there and keeps the audience at their seats end. The tone of the film moves up and down with the fate of the protagonist.
The larger than life characters created by Rowling are showcased in the silver screen in their true avatar.
Audiences would not only love the virtuous Harry, brave Ron, intelligent Hermoine but they would also fall in love with the almost mad bellatrix, the control freak Snape and the vicious Voldemort. Although at times the film appears dim but that adds to the gloomy feel. The audiences would really submerge in the world where everything is wrong and Harry is their only hope.
Coming a full circle, Harry ends his journey in Hogwarts (the place that gave him his individuality) and duels with the greatest lord of Non Muggle world. To say more would really be not fair to the audiences as this movie is surely a visual treat, with the duel scenes creating magic on screen. To watch it in 3D adds to the magic.
The actors have done their very best and we see all them matured and ready to face the world. For the Potter fans this movie would again be nostalgic as they would experience the bittersweet ending of the world of Harry Potter.
THE POTTER mania is back again, what with David Yates and JK Rowling having to offer the last movie of the Potter series. The review of the movie is great, as per critics, as the cinematography is perfectly in place with the latest technology in Hollywood. If not a Potter fan, a person who loves watching real magic created in front of the camera should definitely watch this weekend's most awaited film 'Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2'.
The darkest part of the Potter series is also the shortest part. It finishes in 2 hours and 10 minutes but the tone of the film is just right. The last part ending at the death of Dobby (the house Elf) this part takes off from there and keeps the audience at their seats end. The tone of the film moves up and down with the fate of the protagonist.
The larger than life characters created by Rowling are showcased in the silver screen in their true avatar.
Audiences would not only love the virtuous Harry, brave Ron, intelligent Hermoine but they would also fall in love with the almost mad bellatrix, the control freak Snape and the vicious Voldemort. Although at times the film appears dim but that adds to the gloomy feel. The audiences would really submerge in the world where everything is wrong and Harry is their only hope.
Coming a full circle, Harry ends his journey in Hogwarts (the place that gave him his individuality) and duels with the greatest lord of Non Muggle world. To say more would really be not fair to the audiences as this movie is surely a visual treat, with the duel scenes creating magic on screen. To watch it in 3D adds to the magic.
The actors have done their very best and we see all them matured and ready to face the world. For the Potter fans this movie would again be nostalgic as they would experience the bittersweet ending of the world of Harry Potter.
Book Professional Dancing Entertainment for Your Upcoming Affair
Pro dancing entertainment is ordinarilya greatmethod toboostthe degree ofenjoyment at keycorporate and businesspartiesand otheroccasions, and that's whyso manyconsumersbook dancers for variouspartiestoday. Viewinghigh qualityenergeticballroom dancers has turned intoa reallypopulartype ofentertainment. DWTS, or Dancing with the Stars,isconsidered one of the most enjoyedprogramsseen onTV, and it isvery easyto ascertainthe reason why. With theirstimulatingand livelyroutines or spellbinding interpretations of fabulousmusic, in conjunction withgorgeous and colorfuloutfits and lovelytunes, it truly isenoughto makeany person want to sit up and pay attention.
Sitting on arecliner and enjoyingdancingshowsontelevisionis without question1way toobtainsatisfactionthroughdance, althoughwatchingsuchmarvelousdancersin person andon the stage is usuallya good deal more thrilling. Watchingdancers live as one of a hugeaudiencegives that excessivetouch of enchantment and energy to the functionand often willalterhow you willthink aboutdancingentertainmentalways and forever. Thethrill and intensity level is so muchhigherin personas compared toobserving it on yourlittletelevisiondisplay. Dancing, wheneverit'sclose up and personal, is acompletenewexperience.
Spectacular and occasionallydaringcostumeshave proven to beone of the manyforemostaspectsthatmakesuchkinds of performancesstimulating. Lavishlengthygownsin motionthrough the course ofan intimatenumberor evendazzling and alluringdressesshimmering as athleticmovesare performed perfectly, supplyloads of style and fascinationto thedancesituation. And easily as satisfyingto thegirlshappens when the guysmaneuversoftlywhilewearingan unbuttonedshirt, showing their perfectly-tonedtorsos. Topprofessionalballroom dancershave the ability tocreatea greatexhibitionthat is going toappeal toeverybody.
The skilled professionalballroom dancers on Dancing with the Starscan captivatecrowds, which havesubsequentlytransformed them intowell-knowncelebrities. Many peoplecan beenthralled by their astoundingtalentin addition totheirsuperstarappearance. These individualsemanatecharm and gracewhetheroff or on the dance floor. Ballroom dancing is amazing and elegant to observe, yethas not beenshowcased until not too long ago. Yet, afterit was eventuallyshown in sucha captivatingway it didn't take very long to getstraight into thesoulsof men and womenin all places. And with a whole lotof theentertainmentworldtodaybecomingunsuitablefor anyfamilyaudience, professional dance entertainment is normallyclean enough foranyone to get pleasure from.
The dancespecialistsyou findonTVhave definitelybecomelooked up to by loads oftv audiencesas a result ofbeingthruststraight into the limelight. Yet, they'remany timeson hand to performathugecorporate and businesscelebrationsas well as othersorts ofelegantevents at quitesensibleprices. Showcasing their talent on televisionis just aminorpart of their existence, and whenthe TV showcomes to an end on DWTSa great number ofof thesetop rateddancersbeginlooking for otherexcitingplaces to displaytheir uniquetalents. In case you arecoordinatinga most importantparty and plan tobook dancers of this particularcompetence, it truly isdoableto do so. Plus,hiringexperienceddanceentertainersis certainlyoneguaranteedapproach toturn your function intoan unforgettable one.
Sitting on arecliner and enjoyingdancingshowsontelevisionis without question1way toobtainsatisfactionthroughdance, althoughwatchingsuchmarvelousdancersin person andon the stage is usuallya good deal more thrilling. Watchingdancers live as one of a hugeaudiencegives that excessivetouch of enchantment and energy to the functionand often willalterhow you willthink aboutdancingentertainmentalways and forever. Thethrill and intensity level is so muchhigherin personas compared toobserving it on yourlittletelevisiondisplay. Dancing, wheneverit'sclose up and personal, is acompletenewexperience.
Spectacular and occasionallydaringcostumeshave proven to beone of the manyforemostaspectsthatmakesuchkinds of performancesstimulating. Lavishlengthygownsin motionthrough the course ofan intimatenumberor evendazzling and alluringdressesshimmering as athleticmovesare performed perfectly, supplyloads of style and fascinationto thedancesituation. And easily as satisfyingto thegirlshappens when the guysmaneuversoftlywhilewearingan unbuttonedshirt, showing their perfectly-tonedtorsos. Topprofessionalballroom dancershave the ability tocreatea greatexhibitionthat is going toappeal toeverybody.
The skilled professionalballroom dancers on Dancing with the Starscan captivatecrowds, which havesubsequentlytransformed them intowell-knowncelebrities. Many peoplecan beenthralled by their astoundingtalentin addition totheirsuperstarappearance. These individualsemanatecharm and gracewhetheroff or on the dance floor. Ballroom dancing is amazing and elegant to observe, yethas not beenshowcased until not too long ago. Yet, afterit was eventuallyshown in sucha captivatingway it didn't take very long to getstraight into thesoulsof men and womenin all places. And with a whole lotof theentertainmentworldtodaybecomingunsuitablefor anyfamilyaudience, professional dance entertainment is normallyclean enough foranyone to get pleasure from.
The dancespecialistsyou findonTVhave definitelybecomelooked up to by loads oftv audiencesas a result ofbeingthruststraight into the limelight. Yet, they'remany timeson hand to performathugecorporate and businesscelebrationsas well as othersorts ofelegantevents at quitesensibleprices. Showcasing their talent on televisionis just aminorpart of their existence, and whenthe TV showcomes to an end on DWTSa great number ofof thesetop rateddancersbeginlooking for otherexcitingplaces to displaytheir uniquetalents. In case you arecoordinatinga most importantparty and plan tobook dancers of this particularcompetence, it truly isdoableto do so. Plus,hiringexperienceddanceentertainersis certainlyoneguaranteedapproach toturn your function intoan unforgettable one.
Thursday, 7 July 2011
3 Reasons There Are So Many Jews In Comedy
Six years ago, boyish Cracked editor Jack O'Brien suggested I write about why there are so many Jews in comedy. Granted, we were discussing an article I had pitched about American Jews, but I have to admit the request struck me as a little odd -- not just because here at Cracked I'm the lone Jew amid an endless sea of dirty Irish bastards -- but because today we tend not to point these things out. Just like we don't mention how so many Greeks own diners or how often the brides I order through the mail turn out to
be Ukrainian. Still, Jack was hardly the first to make the association. The relationship between Jews and comedy has been noted frequently by scholars, serious talk-show hosts, and pudgy AEπ guys.
And with good reason. No one can ignore the powerful Jewish presence in American comedy: the Marx Brothers, the Three Stooges, George Burns, Jack Benny, Milton Berle, Sid Caesar, Carl Reiner, Neil Simon, Woody Allen, Mel Brooks, Henny Youngman, Jonathan Katz, Jackie Mason, Don Rickles, Buddy Hackett, Rodney Dangerfield, Lenny Bruce, Gilda Radner, Andy Kaufman, Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David, Adam Sandler, Ben Stiller, Sarah Silverman, Andy Samberg, Judd Apatow, Jon Stewart and far too many more to mention. All these names beg the question: Just how unfunny is Noam Chomsky that he was forced into the history business?
In any event, in light of the above, I decided to give Jack the politically correct answer by telling him the Jews had been forced into comedy by the downsizing of the Zionist Occupied Government and continued outsourcing of baptized-baby-blood-drinking jobs. My sarcasm flowed from many places, but I had to admit I didn't have a more satisfying response. I simply didn't know why there were so many Jews in comedy. My Hebrew school certainly didn't offer credits in stand-up, although I have to admit my Bar Mitzvah speech totally killed. Ten straight minutes on hookers and blow.

"Leave the cocaine, but get that midget in fishnets out of here!!!" (nailed it)So, six years later, with a column deadline approaching (and full-grown Jack now Editor-in-Chief) it seemed a good time to get back into it.
Ultimately I realized I was making a mistake by focusing on the Jew in isolation. If Jew plus America equaled comedy, then there had to be something funny about that combination. And there is.
In America, Jews are a white minority. Think about that: We can live comfortably, practice freely and bowl adequately. But being a Jew in America is like using left-handed scissors: You can make it work, but it just doesn't feel right. This is Jesusland. Always has been, always will be. So perhaps what makes Jews so funny is not Judaism, but Christianity -- and the American Jew's constant immersion in it. Don't believe me? Who could blame you? It's easy to accept that Jesus healed the sick, raised the dead and walked on water, but believing he begat the funniest fuckers on the planet would take a true leap of faith.
Sometime shortly after birth, an American Jew realizes he's in the minority. That realization takes a little longer if the delivering obstetrician is Jewish or if the baby's born in New York, but it's still clear from very early on. This is a Christian show, and that's no accident. Because when it comes to amassing a religious majority, Christianity, like most winners, cheats. And not just in the big historical ways (Spanish Inquisition, Crusades, Santa Claus), but with something more basic, something all around us: Christianity has ingrained an almost irresistibly hard sell right into its architecture. Beautifully adorned churches demand awe and reverence. Towering steeples force spectators to raise their eyes toward the heavens where affixed crucifixes live in the sky. You can't see a church without looking up at God.

Trinity Church on Broadway. Historically significant for inspiring both the point above and Nic Cage's National Treasure. Oh yeah, Alexander Hamilton is buried here too.Surely, Christianity is God's true religion because unlike comparatively modest synagogues, churches are more than houses of God; they're homes for God. A place He might actually crash after a hard day of smiting. Sometimes He even hangs out there in those terrifyingly inspirational wax museum curios. You know what He looks like. The proof is in the plaster. (Though it strikes me as odd that a religion that places such a high premium on faith would leave so little to the imagination.)
And while I'm referring more to the flashiness of Catholicism than Christianity as a whole, Jews know as much about these differences as gentiles do about varying Sephardic and Ashkenazi pronunciations. In the end, all that matters to Jews is that it's a Christian world and Christianity is growing, setting up shop in more and more places, always ahead of the competition and undaunted by the occasional lawsuit. Just like McDonald's.
Jews know this. And we accept that Christianity is lovely and successful and popular and comforting. Furthermore, we know all about you without even going to church because -- unlike the mysteries of our minority religion -- Christianity flourishes in the secular world. There are really good Christmas carols and Christmas movies and New Testament allegorical adventures with talking animals. But sometimes Christianity's uber-majority status becomes empowering to the point of perversion. Either that or they must be handing out testicles at mass, because some Christians actually have the balls to complain about "Jewish paranoia" as if six million Jewish men, women and children weren't rounded up, shipped out, tortured and killed in the middle of the 20th century. Calling Jews "paranoid" is like giving shit to Christians in Ancient Rome for acting "kinda jumpy" around lions.
So, yeah, that's being a Jew in America. It's not heartbreaking, it's not debilitating and it's clearly not as difficult as being a nonwhite minority. And while 2,000 years ago we might have gotten all Judah Maccabee on your ass, now all we have is Jon Stewart (and he's not as good with a hammer as we hoped). So what else can we do except joke about it? Besides, comedy can be powerful. Humor can undo some deeply held beliefs. Just look at Jerry Lewis. How else, but through comedy, could the French be fooled into loving such a greasy Jew?

We don't have saints in Judaism, so I cannot confirm or deny that this picture is surrounded by candles in my basement.But is that all Jewish comedy really is? A way of complaining? A subtler form of throwing a punch? A cry for acceptance? For some, sure, but those guys never seem to make it past a couple of Letterman appearances. There's more to it than that because the truth is, we're not sore losers. We haven't even lost. Look it up. There's never been a race between Judaism and Christianity to see who could amass the greatest numbers of souls. Judaism has always been an invitation-only affair, a reward that's unsettlingly similar to a punishment. Like when the schoolteacher picks the good kid to help clean the erasers after class, Judaism is something of a burden. And that accounts for a need for humor as much as anything else.
Jews go by many names: "Children of Israel," "Members of the Tribe," "Executive Producer." But perhaps the most descriptive is "Chosen People." Chosen. Set apart by God. That means we don't go looking for converts. Indeed, if a gentile comes to a rabbi seeking conversion, the rabbi is to refuse the candidate three times before even discussing the possibility of converting. Three times. Don't hate us for that. It's not like we're bogarting the one true path to salvation. We don't have a heaven, and if we did, we wouldn't believe that only Jews go there. It's not like Miami Beach.
The three refusals are to make sure the potential Jew is serious and tenacious. Because there's work to be done. The world is incomplete, and God chose the Jews to complete it. Not chosen to reach heaven before others, but chosen to help with the heavy lifting during the final phases of construction. This concept is embodied in the Hebrew phrase "tikkun olam," which roughly translates to "putting the world in order," and conveys an obligation on Jews to pursue social justice. And even though countless Jews have never heard this phrase, we all carry it in our hearts, somehow.
But how does a Jew -- even a religiously ignorant Jew -- achieve these ends? How does a Jew complete the world? Charitable donation? Labor organization? New York Times op-ed? We don't know. Somewhere there is a nagging voice telling us that everything is not all right. That action can't be left to someone else at some other time. It's hard to say if it's the voice of God or the voice of history. Philip Roth would make a joke about it being the voice of our mothers, but apparently he was raised by a cartoon. And still, we hear that voice and, without knowing what to do with it, sometimes we make a joke. Can making a joke mend the world? It couldn't hurt.
And with good reason. No one can ignore the powerful Jewish presence in American comedy: the Marx Brothers, the Three Stooges, George Burns, Jack Benny, Milton Berle, Sid Caesar, Carl Reiner, Neil Simon, Woody Allen, Mel Brooks, Henny Youngman, Jonathan Katz, Jackie Mason, Don Rickles, Buddy Hackett, Rodney Dangerfield, Lenny Bruce, Gilda Radner, Andy Kaufman, Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David, Adam Sandler, Ben Stiller, Sarah Silverman, Andy Samberg, Judd Apatow, Jon Stewart and far too many more to mention. All these names beg the question: Just how unfunny is Noam Chomsky that he was forced into the history business?
In any event, in light of the above, I decided to give Jack the politically correct answer by telling him the Jews had been forced into comedy by the downsizing of the Zionist Occupied Government and continued outsourcing of baptized-baby-blood-drinking jobs. My sarcasm flowed from many places, but I had to admit I didn't have a more satisfying response. I simply didn't know why there were so many Jews in comedy. My Hebrew school certainly didn't offer credits in stand-up, although I have to admit my Bar Mitzvah speech totally killed. Ten straight minutes on hookers and blow.
"Leave the cocaine, but get that midget in fishnets out of here!!!" (nailed it)
#3.
The Comedic Effect of Christianity
In America, Jews are a white minority. Think about that: We can live comfortably, practice freely and bowl adequately. But being a Jew in America is like using left-handed scissors: You can make it work, but it just doesn't feel right. This is Jesusland. Always has been, always will be. So perhaps what makes Jews so funny is not Judaism, but Christianity -- and the American Jew's constant immersion in it. Don't believe me? Who could blame you? It's easy to accept that Jesus healed the sick, raised the dead and walked on water, but believing he begat the funniest fuckers on the planet would take a true leap of faith.
Sometime shortly after birth, an American Jew realizes he's in the minority. That realization takes a little longer if the delivering obstetrician is Jewish or if the baby's born in New York, but it's still clear from very early on. This is a Christian show, and that's no accident. Because when it comes to amassing a religious majority, Christianity, like most winners, cheats. And not just in the big historical ways (Spanish Inquisition, Crusades, Santa Claus), but with something more basic, something all around us: Christianity has ingrained an almost irresistibly hard sell right into its architecture. Beautifully adorned churches demand awe and reverence. Towering steeples force spectators to raise their eyes toward the heavens where affixed crucifixes live in the sky. You can't see a church without looking up at God.
Trinity Church on Broadway. Historically significant for inspiring both the point above and Nic Cage's National Treasure. Oh yeah, Alexander Hamilton is buried here too.
And while I'm referring more to the flashiness of Catholicism than Christianity as a whole, Jews know as much about these differences as gentiles do about varying Sephardic and Ashkenazi pronunciations. In the end, all that matters to Jews is that it's a Christian world and Christianity is growing, setting up shop in more and more places, always ahead of the competition and undaunted by the occasional lawsuit. Just like McDonald's.
Jews know this. And we accept that Christianity is lovely and successful and popular and comforting. Furthermore, we know all about you without even going to church because -- unlike the mysteries of our minority religion -- Christianity flourishes in the secular world. There are really good Christmas carols and Christmas movies and New Testament allegorical adventures with talking animals. But sometimes Christianity's uber-majority status becomes empowering to the point of perversion. Either that or they must be handing out testicles at mass, because some Christians actually have the balls to complain about "Jewish paranoia" as if six million Jewish men, women and children weren't rounded up, shipped out, tortured and killed in the middle of the 20th century. Calling Jews "paranoid" is like giving shit to Christians in Ancient Rome for acting "kinda jumpy" around lions.
So, yeah, that's being a Jew in America. It's not heartbreaking, it's not debilitating and it's clearly not as difficult as being a nonwhite minority. And while 2,000 years ago we might have gotten all Judah Maccabee on your ass, now all we have is Jon Stewart (and he's not as good with a hammer as we hoped). So what else can we do except joke about it? Besides, comedy can be powerful. Humor can undo some deeply held beliefs. Just look at Jerry Lewis. How else, but through comedy, could the French be fooled into loving such a greasy Jew?
We don't have saints in Judaism, so I cannot confirm or deny that this picture is surrounded by candles in my basement.
#2.
Tikkun Olam and Comedy
Jews go by many names: "Children of Israel," "Members of the Tribe," "Executive Producer." But perhaps the most descriptive is "Chosen People." Chosen. Set apart by God. That means we don't go looking for converts. Indeed, if a gentile comes to a rabbi seeking conversion, the rabbi is to refuse the candidate three times before even discussing the possibility of converting. Three times. Don't hate us for that. It's not like we're bogarting the one true path to salvation. We don't have a heaven, and if we did, we wouldn't believe that only Jews go there. It's not like Miami Beach.
The three refusals are to make sure the potential Jew is serious and tenacious. Because there's work to be done. The world is incomplete, and God chose the Jews to complete it. Not chosen to reach heaven before others, but chosen to help with the heavy lifting during the final phases of construction. This concept is embodied in the Hebrew phrase "tikkun olam," which roughly translates to "putting the world in order," and conveys an obligation on Jews to pursue social justice. And even though countless Jews have never heard this phrase, we all carry it in our hearts, somehow.
But how does a Jew -- even a religiously ignorant Jew -- achieve these ends? How does a Jew complete the world? Charitable donation? Labor organization? New York Times op-ed? We don't know. Somewhere there is a nagging voice telling us that everything is not all right. That action can't be left to someone else at some other time. It's hard to say if it's the voice of God or the voice of history. Philip Roth would make a joke about it being the voice of our mothers, but apparently he was raised by a cartoon. And still, we hear that voice and, without knowing what to do with it, sometimes we make a joke. Can making a joke mend the world? It couldn't hurt.
Booking a Wedding Band in London
Choosing your wedding music is one of the most important tasks for brides and grooms to be. A wedding band does more than just entertain guests; they set the mood for the entire evening. The right band can enhance your wedding atmosphere, whether it be elegant, sophisticated, playful or casual. With so many wedding bands in London, make sure you are making the right choice by considering the following tips.
Set the Mood
Considering your overall wedding theme will help guide you toward the type of music that will fit your reception. What do you want the general feel of your wedding to be? Do you envision your guests dancing until their feet hurt, or do you picture a more sedated affair with lots of mingling and conversation? Answering these questions first will help define your event and narrow down the characteristics you are looking for in wedding bands London.
The Venue
Considering your venues' limitations will help narrow down your choices of wedding bands London. You may fall in love with that 20-piece swing band, but can your venue accommodate a band that large? Does the venue have their own sound equipment or must the band provide everything they will need?
Research, Research, Research!
Your choice of wedding band will clearly have a significant effect on your wedding's atmosphere, so do thorough research on any prospective musicians. Ask trusted friends and family for recommendations and seek a wide range of reviews by doing an internet search.
The Interview
Once you have made a list of potential wedding bands, set up an audition and interview session. If you cannot see the band perform live, ask for tapes or CDs and take detailed notes as they answer your questions. Referring to these sources later will make it easier for you to compare the different bands you have seen.
Ask about the band's history and schedule. How long have they been playing together? Do they often play more than one wedding in a day? How long is a typical set? Do they provide other music during breaks?
Inquire about fees. Is there a flat fee per hour or per musician? How do they charge for overtime? Is a deposit required? What is their policy in the event of a cancellation?
Finally, before signing a contract, ask for references. A band with the perfect sound for your celebration may have a poor history of showing up late or not showing up at all. Make the right choice by asking for references and following up on them.
Set the Mood
Considering your overall wedding theme will help guide you toward the type of music that will fit your reception. What do you want the general feel of your wedding to be? Do you envision your guests dancing until their feet hurt, or do you picture a more sedated affair with lots of mingling and conversation? Answering these questions first will help define your event and narrow down the characteristics you are looking for in wedding bands London.
The Venue
Considering your venues' limitations will help narrow down your choices of wedding bands London. You may fall in love with that 20-piece swing band, but can your venue accommodate a band that large? Does the venue have their own sound equipment or must the band provide everything they will need?
Research, Research, Research!
Your choice of wedding band will clearly have a significant effect on your wedding's atmosphere, so do thorough research on any prospective musicians. Ask trusted friends and family for recommendations and seek a wide range of reviews by doing an internet search.
The Interview
Once you have made a list of potential wedding bands, set up an audition and interview session. If you cannot see the band perform live, ask for tapes or CDs and take detailed notes as they answer your questions. Referring to these sources later will make it easier for you to compare the different bands you have seen.
Ask about the band's history and schedule. How long have they been playing together? Do they often play more than one wedding in a day? How long is a typical set? Do they provide other music during breaks?
Inquire about fees. Is there a flat fee per hour or per musician? How do they charge for overtime? Is a deposit required? What is their policy in the event of a cancellation?
Finally, before signing a contract, ask for references. A band with the perfect sound for your celebration may have a poor history of showing up late or not showing up at all. Make the right choice by asking for references and following up on them.
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